You’re Overly Nice About EVERYTHING
You probably pass people you don’t know on the street and still make an effort to smile or say “hello” if you make eye contact. Most other places find this weird or uncomfortable, but in the Midwest you don’t think twice about it. And if you happen to bump into someone in public? You’ll both apologize profusely before parting ways with a jovial “have a nice day!”
You Aren’t Even Phased By The Ranch Dressing Obsession
People in the Midwest put this stuff on literally everything. Chicken strips? Of course! Vegetables? Duh!! Pizza? Why Not!!! Instead of looking at someone funny when they put it on something you haven’t before, you look at them and probably go “Why didn’t I think of that?!”
You’re Constantly Switching Between “Pop” And “Soda”, Depending On What State You’re In
For some reason, people seem to be very particular about this one. Some place you go people will say soda and in other places people will say pop. But trust me when I say, people from the Midwest will definitely get defensive over which one it is they use!
You Know That Once That First Snowfall Hits, Half The People On The Road Are Gonna Forget How To Drive
Once the flakes start falling, it’s as if everyone suddenly lost the ability to drive the speed limit or merge or stay inside their lane for that matter. You will complain about it yearly, yet soon enough it will practically feel like a winter tradition.
Caribou Trumps Starbucks Any Day
Anyone can go out and get some Starbucks, but you feel extra special because you have the nectar of the coffee gods available to you, AKA Caribou. You know what they say … anything Starbucks can make, Caribou can make better ;)
Hotdishes Are Basically Another Food Group
If you didn’t spend 75% of your meals eating hot dishes did you even grow up in the Midwest? The Tater Tot Hot Dish seems to be the favorite around here but hey, we’re open to suggestions!
You Know “Puppy Chow” Isn’t Something You Feed Your Dog
You know this stuff is one of the best snacks around. As a kid you begged your mom to pretty please make this stuff and put it in your lunch every once in a while. Oh and when someone brought a big bowl of it to your class party for the holidays, you knew what you were grabbing off the treat table first.
It’s Perfectly Acceptable To Consider 40 Degrees “Shorts Weather”
In fact, if there’s no snow on the ground you won’t even be shocked to see people breaking out the sandals. To the rest of the country this might be jeans and jacket weather, but here in the midwest this is practically perfect fall weather.
You Already Know That People Will Make Fun Of Your Accent, But You Love It Regardless
People are constantly telling you to say things like “dontcha know” or “you betcha”. If they’ve seen Fargo, they’re probably shocked you don’t sound the exact same way they do in the movie, but you secretly know you sound so much cooler.
You’ve Come To Accept The Fact That There Are Only 2 Seasons: Winter And Construction
One half of the time you will experience the midwestern winters, and the other half will be taken up by the hell that is contraction season. Half the roads you normally take will be shut down, including the main highway, and the back roads will be backed up for hours because no one (including you) knows how to get where you’re going without a road to take you there.
Once The Temperature Drops, UGG Boots And North Face Jackets Are Practically The Universal Uniform
With all the cold weather plaguing us here in the Midwest, you’ve learned how to forget about what’s fashionable and go for the two most important things: comfort and warmth. You could care less that you look like a marshmallow with sausages for feet, because at least you’re toasty and have dry feet!
BONUS: If You’re From Minnesota (Like Us!), Your Drink Of Choice Is Probably An Ice Cold Michelob Golden Draft
I still haven’t heard of this outside of Minnesota, but if you do live here you know that almost everyone drinks this stuff! People in the south will probably have no idea what you’re talking about and yet when you go out of state for vacation, you’ll faithfully ask the waiter if they carry it because it’s like, totally you’re favorite drink ever, dontcha know.